Coming to terms that my mourning will last a lifetime-For a lifetime never had.

Why is it so hard without you here.

I search for you everywhere- I looked in others and empty glasses.

I read words you never wrote- yet my hands did not purge them.

Two beers-two coffees-two please…


Two breaths that I can’t breathe- Did you make this asthma in me?

I’ll go to therapy soon- and tell them the most fucked up things about how I keep you with me.

Tattoos cover me- yet nothing ink has changed exorcised you from me.

Is it true- that death is the only cure for our separation?

It is true- that death was the cause for our separation.


I found our family- I left them till death.

I was as disposable to them- as you were in death.

Let them mourn- both of us.


I sit- in front of a mirror.

I sit- a mirror in my backpack.

I sit- a mirror in my lap.

Yet- I am petrified of broken glass.

Yet- petrified broken of what we represent.